Episode 121: Things They Should Have Told You About Caregiving Part 3
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Download a free version of Caregiving Confessions Here!
Transcript
Welcome to Part Three of The Things They Should Have Told You summer series where I take you back to the 4 most important episodes for caregivers to listen to no matter how long they’ve been a caregiver. Here you can find Part 1 and Part 2 if you missed them.
One of the main reasons I started this podcast is to help other caregivers realize they are not alone. If that is part of why you listen to this podcast I’d love to know! Leave a review on iTunes or send me an email via my website www.loveyourcaregivinglife.com and click on contact on the bottom of the page or simply respond to my newsletter if you get it.
Loneliness makes everything else feel harder. It gives all the emotions we feel as caregivers more power because we think we’re the one ones feeling them. That is why I decided to start sharing what I’ve gone through, what I’m going through and how I found ways to enjoy my life as a caregiver - so you would know everyone has to find their way, we all experience a lot of the same things and maybe sharing my story can help you avoid some of the roadblocks I faced.
Knowing you aren’t alone in this is one of the first things I’d love all caregivers to know. This episode is one of my favorites but it almost didn’t get recorded. I did a lot of crying when I wrote this and I could hardly get through recording it so for a moment I considered not doing it at all. I was worried and a little scared that being this vulnerable was too much but then I realized that is what I’m trying to fight. We hide the things that make us feel most vulnerable and usually those are emotions and thoughts caused by our caregiving experience. So how could I NOT publish an episode that is exactly what I needed to hear not only when I first became a caregiver but even some days today ten years later!
So let’s just get to it. Here is “You Are Not Alone”
I see you.
When did you have that moment where it all hit you? When you realized that your life would be completely different from that moment forward while the rest of the world seemed to continue on its course.
That moment that made your heart hurt. When the emotion behind the cry was so intense you couldn’t seem to get it out. Your body full of anger, and sadness all at the same time.
When did you feel that you were kicked off the bus and everyone continued on without you? When you got that sinking feeling in your stomach and no way to use words to describe it to anyone?
Do you remember the moment when the fear hit you. The panic slapped you in the face and the loss tore at you from the inside?
The moment you felt so alone when all you wanted was a hug from him, from her, from them, but it was just you alone in that room crying?
We hear you. I hear you. I see you and I’ll tell you
It isn’t fair, you’re right.
It sucks completely
Some people will be sacred away, some won’t be good humans and you can be angry about it.
There will be days and nights where it all gets too heavy and you will feel suffocated but you will find a way to breathe!
You are so much stronger than you think you are.
You can actually do this.
You aren’t alone, we’ve felt the same things and we have the emotional scars just like you.
We feel the fear with you.
We feel the pain and anger.
We feel the sadness, the loss and grief with you.
We know the loneliness
You’re not alone, we feel with you.
I’m here to tell you that you will have moments when you’ll notice the beauty of their smile. The little moments will hold so much more weight now.
Pay attention to those moments. They are signs that there is a reason. That this is worth it. A reminder that there is beauty in life that will show from under the darkness.
Be open to feel Joy and Pain equally.
Allow yourself to feel the sorrow but also feel the promise a new day brings.
Know that these feelings will come in waves. When you have a moment of joy allow yourself to experience that joy and don’t tell yourself you don’t deserve it.
Find ways you can give your mind a break from the worry and fear. Don’t miss the moments you have right now because you are too focussed on what will be in the future.
Cry, Sing, Dance, Stomp, Scream, BREATHE….
Life threw you something you didn’t want but you can do what you need to live as a caregiver.
This series will be continued into the August issue of Caregiving confessions the digital magazine for caregivers. If you haven’t subscribed find all the information at loveyourcaregivinglife.com/confessions. The August issue will expand on the episodes you will hear this month and will include a live session with me and other caregivers to answer your questions and connect. Join us at loveyourcaregivinglife.com/caregivers.
Thank you for listening.
Download a free version of Caregiving Confessions Here!
