Episode 67: The Power of a Phone Call

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The phone call.

 You know, the call from the Dr that you are waiting for. You have no idea when it will come and you definitely don’t want to miss it because that means the process would start all over again.

 Today let’s talk about waiting for the call.

 I remember when my husband was first diagnosed with thyroid cancer. There were a lot of tests that needed to be coordinated. Phone calls put into the oncologist and endocrinologist that were to be returned at their earliest convenience. There was a lot of anxiety and anticipation waiting for those phone calls. 

 I’ve jumped out of bathrooms, run down hallways, leaped out of exercises classes, bolted out of movie theaters, and jammed my finger in my ear trying to quiet everything going on around so I can hear those important words.

 It is unimaginable the power of the spoken word when your family member has cancer. You strain to hear every word and then at some point - especially if it’s bad news- your ability to hear what is being said stops. Or the thought spiral starts to become too loud and it makes it difficult to hear the person speaking. Or maybe you actually hear the words but don’t want to accept what you heard so you ask them to repeat it only to hear the same thing. Then there is the question you wanted to ask but couldn’t remember what it was until you hung up the phone!

 A phone call can make or break your day, your week, your year. It can set off a cascade of events and change your life. Or it can continue to leave you in suspense. 

 You could find out that there are more tests that need to be done. A different doctor needs to look at the results. A team needs to be consulted. Your insurance has gotten back to them to tell them if a treatment plan is accepted. 

 Maybe you do remember the question while on the phone and once you ask it you realize you don’t really get the type of answer you were looking for and since both your brain and that of the doctor are on two different wavelengths you keep asking the same question but in a different way until you both understand the question and answer. 

 The dreaded phone call that causes you to frantically search for your cell phone because they could call right now..now..they could call right now and you run all around the house to find it when you had it in your pocket the whole time.

 I don’t know how many times I’ve checked a phone to make sure the ringer was turned all the way up. Worried that the one time I needed to hear it I wouldn’t. 

 Maybe that call takes an hour or day longer than you expect it would. The frustration and anxiety that causes can be all-consuming. Suddenly all you can think about is the phone call you are waiting for. That’s when your thoughts and emotions start to take you away. If there is any trigger for negative self-talk this would be one. Thinking, it has to be bad that why they haven’t called. Or already telling yourself the news is bad or going down the thought spiral of nothing going good for you EVER! 

 At some point, you realize you are one of a hundred other patients this Dr may be treating or the scheduler is trying to fit in. Everyone feeling their case is more important because cancer can make you self-centered - it’s a normal human reaction in life or death situations and cancer is one of them. Really the person you are waiting to have call is doing their best to get to everyone. 

 Then there is always the possibility that the news is good. You built this phone call up in your head to be this big event and good news can feel like a cause to celebrate or you have yourself so worn out with the waiting that it’s just anticlimactic. 

 The power of a phone call. 

 How quickly we forget how this feels after we are done waiting. 

 Every time we have to wait for a phone call it feels torturous but then we don’t remember how that felt until we have to experience it again. 

 You know what? We always get the phone call. Sure we’ve missed one here and there over the past 6 years. But we always get the information. The appointments always end up being scheduled and we get the bad news and good news no matter what.

 Maybe we don’t always have to put our lives on high alert for that call as much as we have in the past. 

 Thanks for Listening!

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